When Your Spouse Be Like…

“It only takes me 15 minutes to get ready in the morning. What takes you so long?”

I know the photo quality is poor, but hopefully you can tell that EVERY SINGLE DRAWER is opened on the dresser.

I continue to tease him that I can tell exactly what he does every morning because he leaves such a telling trail. Bed unmade, pajamas strewn in a path to the dresser. All drawers open, towel on floor and shower door open. Toothpaste lid off. Downstairs, I can tell what he had for breakfast because of what remains on the counters (English muffins, hummus-coated knife or oatmeal box with the lid off?).

This was in our last house a few years ago. 5 cabinets, one drawer, and the dishwasher all opened.

Why yes, sweetheart, you can absolutely get ready in 15 minutes if that is how you get ready!

Sometimes it feels as though I live with the Nutty Professor. Pat is really, really smart. He works things out in his head with an amazing quickness, and retains a lot of science-y knowledge for years and years. He learned enough about electricity to wire his own electric brewery and he figured out how to renovate our entire kitchen from “YouTube University,” as we like to say. But I have joked that keeping him in line is a full-time job. The way his brain works is not the way my brain works. Thankfully we work really well together!

One of my favorite stories to demonstrate this goes back to our years in college. Pat had won a position and would be leaving the university at the end of the semester, so our teacher was assigning him one major piece from the solo repertoire per week. For those who do not have a background in classical music, this in itself is remarkable because typically studying each masterwork takes months and months of intensive work in the practice room, analyzing the score, collaborating with a pianist, listening to recordings, and then practicing some more.

Not only had Pat not practiced this piece (Brahms f minor Sonata), he couldn’t even FIND it 15 minutes before his lesson. Music was flying off the basement ping-pong table (the stacks, amid empty cups from the local pizza joint and unfolded (clean?) laundry, in no particular order, were his “library”) in desperation before he finally gave up and rushed off to the lesson. Tardiness was not something that would ever be acceptable.

In the lesson (which were always done standing up), Pat angled the music stand away from our professor’s eyes, and proceeded to play the entire sonata. All three movements.

From memory.

The other anecdotal story that I like to share in the Prologue to My Life with the Nutty Professor is the fact that on TWO separate occasions (less than a month apart), Pat accidentally took my keys with him in the morning. AND I HAD TO TAKE A CAB TO WORK. 45 minute ride. $50.

Part of my need for organization is clearly to be able to function with this wonderful husband I have. But I also wanted to provide a bit of insight into this person who will be appearing frequently in this blog. We all have to utilize our assets, and we all were clearly “blessed” in different ways!

(Love you!)

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